The Millionth Time’s the Charm

 

This week has been nothing but solid encouragement.  I used to pray that God would break me, make me completely uncomfortable, tire me of the strength I always pretended to have, to be vulnerable, and open, and aware of how dependent I am on Him. 
I think I’ve talked so much and to so many people in the last 5 days that my throat is starting to feel a little dry.  Before I got here… that just wasn’t me.   I’ve broken a lot of “never-will-I-evers” I’d previously possessed since I got here; that one takes the cake.

I also used to pray that God would show me real community.  When I first read about that first church in Acts, I fell in love. 

“Now the full number of those who believed were of one heart and soul, and no one said that any of the things that belonged to him was his own, but they had everything in common. And with great power the apostles were giving testimony to the resurrection of the Lord Jesus, and great grace was upon them all.” – Acts 4:32-33

I never really took into account that I had to be open with people before they could be my community, though.  I was too often discouraged with the Body, accusing fellowship of being fake or empty.  I didn’t know I was a part of the problem.  I was fake with the Body. 

Sharing my joy was always easier than sharing my burdens, so the people I loved often only saw one side of me.   But, there is so much beauty in letting my family carry my burdens with me that I’ve been missing all this time.  I praise God His love for me that I am seeing in my peers as they care, and carry.  I praise His pursuits for me and the people He’s kept here, waiting for this, waiting for me. 
I heard this song, and though I am not a fan of the style at all, I really liked these words:

Last time we spoke, you said you were hurting,
And I felt your pain in my heart;
I want to tell you that I keep on praying,
Love will find you where you are,
I know cause I've already been there,
So please hear these simple truths:
Be strong in the Lord and never give up hope,
You're going to do great things; I already know,
God's got His hand on you so don't live life in fear,
Forgive and forget, but don't forget why you're here.

It’s been such an amazing occurrence to see the family of God come together to lift up the broken parts, working simultaneously to heal, working for His purpose, and most definitely to His glory.  I’ll just keep standing in awe of that.